Sometimes it’s necessary to distance yourself from certain distractions in your life to concentrate your time, energy and effort on things that matter the most. Don’t be afraid to do that. Your true friends will allow you that space and respect you. Go for it.

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dear me,
i am sorry.
im sorry that you tried so desperately to fix others, when your own hands were shaking. im sorry that i didnt give you enough time to heal, that i let you seal the wounds of everyone else while yours were bleeding. im sorry that there were days when smiling hurt you but you forced yourself to laugh so that no one had to worry about you. im sorry that you gave all your time and effort to people that didnt give the same amount back. im sorry that there were nights when you cried yourself to sleep and no one bothered to understand why. and im sorry that i didnt love you, like you deserved to be loved.

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and even when no one was looking,
I was still kind, when there was no proof,
I was still good.
I do everything with all of my heart,
even when my heart is invisible.

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Being a sensitive person costs you a lot, you always try to hide your feelings, you always pretend that nothing happened, nobody knows how details hurt you, nobody knows how much you will overthink a word told by a beloved person, nobody will ever understand how those tiny actions matter.

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My biggest fear is attachment, getting attached to temporary people, waking up one day and finding that they aren’t here anymore, spending all my time on things that aren’t destined to be mine, putting all my energy and passion into goals and dreams that aren’t meant to be. I fear that I spend too much time walking in the wrong destination.

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There are times where I feel like I can no longer endure all the pain in my heart. It feels so heavy to endure it. I want to forget everything that hurt me, but I can't do it. No matter how hard I try to move forward, I still remember all the things that I have suffered. I am suffering silently, and I cannot tell anyone about it. Sometimes, I just wish that all my pain would just disappear. But it stays in my chest, as if I will never heal.

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At some point in my life, I felt like everything was falling apart. I feel so tired of everything. Sometimes, I want to reach out to people and tell them how not okay I am. I want to tell them that my heart is pounding with pain, and I often wake up lonely at 2 a.m. I feel miserable every night. I want to scream all my pain away, and I want to run away from everything. I feel like every part of me is hurting. My soul is crying for the fact that I feel like I am not going to be okay.

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Sometimes, you'll meet people who fall in love with the idea of who you are. They're drawn to your sparkle, maybe how you look on paper or the way you present yourself to the world. But when it comes down to the real you—with all your complexities, emotions, and the raw truth of your life—they find they're not quite ready. It's not that you're too much; it's that their maturity isn't where it needs to be to truly understand and embrace everything about you.

This doesn't reflect on your value or worth. Everyone is on their own journey, and some just aren't at a point where they can appreciate the depth and breadth of a real, meaningful relationship. It's important to recognize this early on to save yourself the heartache of being misunderstood or undervalued.

But here's the silver lining: realizing this helps you appreciate those who do get it, who love you for everything you are, flaws and all. These are the people who make the rollercoaster of relationships worth it. So, keep shining, being true to yourself, and remember, the right people will love the real you, not just the idea of you.

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I was feeling sad for how someone treated me, but then I remembered I treat people well, I am thoughtful, that's a reflection of me. How people treat me is not mirror of my worth or what I deserve.
May I keep remembering that.!!

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Please keep looking. Not for a partner but for your passion, your courage, your dreams, your goals, your happiness, yourself. Keep looking. Explore yourself before you explore another. Know your worth, know yourself. Only then you would know what you need over what you want. You need yourself to become your own.

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