I write, because for those quiet few moments,
The war inside me melts into a silence and all the broken pieces sit together for a meal that nourishes my soul.

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The poetry of my past,
Sounds too much like my pain of today.
And
I think that is my cue to leave.

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If All it takes,
is for me to surrender,

For you and I to fall away,

Then you were never in it,
in the first place.

That's the grief I have to meet.
to be at Peace.

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I have to admit,
writing for the beauty...
The salutation... the admiration..
Holds me,
To a certain stage.

I have begun to wonder,

Where do I go in my heart,
when there is no one to hold my affection...
And why hadn't that been me ?

Why had my songs, my art, my unreliquished joy become,
Surrounded by the scent,
of the lovers in my life...

When did I sell my being..
Till my Emotion,
My Truth became,
Art,
To be commissioned...

Why did I ask my heart,
To seek...
To be inspired,
by anyone but me...

Why did I ask my heart to wait,
To paint a picture,
Of Love,
That lived in me.

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Someday I will write a tale,
Of someone who left it all,
To float in the magic of possibilities..
Until then,
Until then.
Hope.

-

Brewing in the surface of your fear
of being left.. uncared for... unbothered with.
Unworthy.
You cast a spell of invisibility.
Leaving the light before the dark finds you.
Using your magic as a mask to avoid the sheer terror of it all.
Because after all, you don't fear shadows you fear the fall.

-

Benatar...

Her light, is not the sun, no.
It's the infinite sprinkle of Divine
In the most delectable manner
that the universe could deliver.

Oh... yes, she's Magic.
And a whole lot of other things...

-

Some people are so terrified of Love,
that they settle for bondage instead.

-

It took me the rage of a thousand burning stars, and the despair of a few broken bridges to learn that, patience does not mean 'waiting'.

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"Surrender" without emotional processing is denial...
Faith works with you.
Trust the process, do the work.

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