Dear Mum,

My reservoir of love,

I'm speechless and awestruck at your magnanimity,
You're loftier than any diety, the world has ever known,
You're the uncrowned king,
and a Queen,
that doesn't need any tiara,

How can I ever return the love, the gratitude,
When entire universe is in your debt?


I'm nothing without you,
Dear ma,
You were born to give, and I was born to ask,

And so I ask,
One last thing-

Please depart after me,

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She should be stunning, she should be gorgeous, she should be thoughtful and witty, she should also be loving, caring and supportive; she should turn me on but most important of all - these ladies should not know each other.

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Just stumbled upon this word "blumkin" and now I regret having googled it.

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It is tragic that a confident half-wit fares far better and is more revered than a self doubting genius.

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I've got issues with beautiful people. They don't like me.

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One of the most precious thing a man has are his buttocks.
It's on them he rests when he feels jaded.
It's through them he relieves himself in the morning, and feels few pounds lighter.
It's for them that he can walk, squat and do whatnot!
Strictly speaking, from an ergonomic pov, buttocks are indispensable to his day to day functioning, and wanderings also.

Thank almighty, mine are as splendid as they can be.
I urge you all to take supreme care of your buttocks. You need them more than you may think. Ask someone who has had hemorrhoids or other anal ailments and he'll tell you the inestimable worth of healthy buttocks.
Head out in the open, presumably naked, and let the cool breeze rustle softly on your inestimable butt cheeks. Be thankful, ye worrying, fretting human for the tiny pleasures in life.

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If you know Mia Khalifa, you're corrupt.
And, if you don't, you're ignorant.

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Being witty is utterly exhausting. Let me be foolish for a while.

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"I firmly believe it's impossible for me to be a husband to only one wife."

'How many then, sir, would you like to bestow that honor upon?'

"At least seven. One from each continent. Although I'm quite apprehensive in tying knots with an American and an Australian. The one has a terrible accent and other is allergic to so many things."

'Ah, mighty goals, sire. Mighty goals!'

"I hope I'm not being selfish and intemperate, my friend."

'Quite the contrary, sir. After all, ancient kings of the past have had hundreds of them at a time, or so the history tells us.'

"Oh, I'd love that too if only I could trust history. Besides, to pay for the grooming, housing and other miscellany of hundred wives would drain all my wealth and make me go bankrupt in the very first month of my married life."

'Ahh, but that will occur only if you marry those with a slavish temperament. Think how prodigiously will your wealth multiply if you add to your family hundred wives, all financially independent. One can find so many of them in great metropolis these days. Beware of the parlour feminists though. Those are the kind you do not wanna mess with, let alone propose a marriage.'

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Where do the claustrophobics make out?

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